You cannot simply walk into a room

No, you must announce your arrival

”I am here!”

Mere mortals toast you

You strut; your shoulders locked in some unseen combat with your neck

Neither pretending to dislike what you are doing to them

You flash the newest threads made just for you

Oh, no, no off-the-rack commoner crap

“This is one of a kind!”

Another toast

High and mighty must you be with these mere peons you have invited in your house that resembles the hardest erection one has ever had

For that is who you are: the manliest man’s man who ever strutted along the Earth

People drink your fine wine and taste small edible yummies not pronounceable

They remind you of your marvelous skills, unmatched by anyone across the land

Oh, yes, another toast

But they save their best laugh for themselves

For later and when they are alone and think of the real you

Mere mortals now roast you

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